don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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