so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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