I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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