Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
this beer tastes like vomit already
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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