I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
