i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize