Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
