I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
