I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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