i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
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