Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize