he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Randomize
