Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
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