If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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