did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
