GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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