Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
