OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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