I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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