what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
