sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
You may now shotgun with the bride
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
