The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Someone signed my nipple.
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