People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
