There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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