you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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