When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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