Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
