ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Randomize
