ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
