Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
You smell like stripper and shame
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Randomize
