he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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