don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
