we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
