i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
