So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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