im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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