Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
