idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
