That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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