Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Randomize
