He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
