If i could tip my vagina, i would.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Redeem this text for a blowjob
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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