Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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