I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
