i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
I'm really busy with my period
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