Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize