If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
