He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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