i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Dick very happy bro
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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