I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
